:: View topic - A Dozen Notably Dressed NPCs: A PaizoCon Challenge!

James Thomas · Posted: Sat Jun 16, 2012 5:57 pm Post subject:

I did it! I’ve saved up the money, got the time off work and I’m going to PaizoCon! But first I have a promise to keep. Per Richard Pett’s article and the comments that followed I must roll a d12 and wear the apparel indicated.

I could not roll such a fateful die without proper witnesses… and more. Fortunately (or so I thought) I had contact with certain personages who had the mastery and the will to usher me through a spiritual preparation. Below is an account of that preparation. I’d like to thank the officers of the US Forestry Service as well as members of the State Highway Patrol for their willingness not to prosecute nor inform the press of certain events best left unreported ...and unremembered.

THE ORDEAL

I had not eaten for three days. I now stood in a dim candle-lit room crowded with dark robed figures. My head shaved, I was stripped to the waist in a pair of black silk trousers while out of the darkness drums and pipes and a single triangle drowned out the thoughts in my head. How I had gotten to this dismal cave I only partly remembered…

A bumpy ride in the back of a truck, bound and blindfolded, was followed by a climb up a steep mountain face until dark. That night native drums played to wild dancing and a chorus of riotous tribal voices by firelight. I must have just fallen asleep when I was roused by the barking of coyotes and a bucket of cold water that smelled of beasts and sweat and anger. Pulled to my feet I was chased through the chill night leaving my possessions and part of my humanity behind. I awoke the next morning curled in a nest of pine needles and animal hair. I knew not how I got there but shouts and goading sticks compelled me up an onward to an all day run through endless forest and meadows, always climbing higher and higher. I vaguely remember swimming in a cold lake to a lonely shore where I was led into a sweat lodge. There for uncounted hours I was loudly accused in unfamiliar tongues and made to drink a bitter beverage brewed from tree bark and strange fungi. My contenders seemed to grow larger and stranger turning into half beasts of men. I grew dizzy, swayed, and lost consciousness.

When I awoke I was lying on wet ground gazing up at the sky through tall pines in the fading twilight. I was alone, but standing and looking around expectedly I saw my guide: a white mare just visible through the trees. I instinctively knew I must follow and chased her in broken shoes and tattered clothes through narrow trails. Seemingly always just out of my sight my guide led me out at last onto an old abandoned highway. The pavement was archaic and broken from disuse and seemed lost out of time. I gazed briefly over a panoramic view of endless mountains and coniferous forests. What land was I in? What country? What world? The mare trotted off again and I pursued. I ran on as in a dream. The chase was now my only desire – my only familiar fragment of meaning. She cantered down the old road and around a narrow bend. A crumbling stone rail precipitated a steep drop and the pavement was scattered with loose gravel. As I rounded the corner the white horse was gone! But beyond I saw my destination: a stone façade on the side of a great mountain frowning dark and shadowy in the dim light. I ran toward it like home, thoughtless of any danger, stumbling over rocks and debris. There was a great door and an entryway choked with dirt, dust and weeds. Before I could touch the doors they pulled open and a miasma of ages and incense gushed over me. Pale hands yanked me in. I was stripped, washed, clothed, shaved and scented with rose water – all in a near darkness, heavy with fragrance and strange nasal chanting like Eastern monks.

Now in the Chamber of Destiny I stepped furtively forward amid the clamor of wild music and received from the hand of a chosen maid pint after pint of The Five Sacred Beverages. As I drank I noticed that my skin was covered with strange sigils. I hadn’t a clue how they got there but I knew they represented the twelve great symbols… the Symbols of Fate. The libations over I staggered forward. There was a pedestal at the far end of the crowded, candle-lit cave. I stepped toward it. The drums played on more maddeningly than before and the triangle – oh the triangle! How beautifully it played its five beat rhythm! As I neared the pedestal I saw there a small leather cup and a pebble-like polyhedron. In my malaise it seemed like I had never seen such wonderful things before. They fascinated me by their color and shape. Grinning eagerly I reached out my hand to grasp and saw to my horror that my arm was strange and alien… my fingers blurred and polydactyl. A longhaired phantom laughed derisively at my dismay and another phantom bespectacled with short hair mouthed urgent words that I could not hear! Then somehow -- above the clamor -- a soft, feminine voice whispered, “Roll the die...”

With sudden clarity, I grabbed the d12, tossed it into the cup and thrust it up over my head! As the crowed roared I rolled the die round and round in the cup like a Vegas professional. I paused dramatically. Then! Overturning the cup I slammed it down on the pedestal!

All fell silent.

I lifted the cup, without even looking at the number displayed. Peering over the crowd, I saw it all on their faces…
_________________
Kobold Minion #66
MightyMongo's Summoned Monster
Freelancer 2, Game Master 7, Historian 5

Kobold Courier