For those adventurers attending swanky feasts amid peerage or others who can afford to have ice sculptures, it might be more what’s INSIDE the sculpture that draws their eyes. You can roll randomly for a result below, or use the handy number provided with each entry to figure out your result on a d12. You can also pick the one that works for the area in which your characters currently linger.
Art by Mike Lowe
“This the east wing. We’re going to have all this knocked through.”
“Impressive, potential master, very impressive.”
“So tell me again, er—possible slave, who have you familiared for before?”
“Ooo, many great masters: Dolus the Magenta, Whitly the Tarish Orange, and Murky son of Murky—to name but three.”
“I see, I see, and do you mind awfully if I ask—just what exactly are you?”
“Well I’m a type of homunculus made up of fish parts, pigs bits, and the greater portions of a gargoyle. But my former master simply called me Bruce. Tell me, potential master, if I may ask, what is in that beer bottle on top of the housekeeper’s cabinet?”
“That? Oh nothing. Just part of the furniture—an old familiar I discarded some time ago, Bruce.”
Let’s face it. We’re all surrounded by furniture, and yet, in general, it plays only a tertiary background role in adventures; furnishings, if you will. This seems to be an opportunity missed; it’s all very well having collections of dormice, trays of carefully catalogued stirge proboscis, and an unrivalled collection of flies, but where is it all housed? What does Zandooor the Magenta sit upon when he breakfasts? Does he spend his hours locked away in a strange cupboard or lost in a warehouse-sized study that would make the busiest antique shop look shabby?
After being padlocked all Koboldsgiving week, the gates to the warrens burst open this morning to reveal FABULOUS TREASURE. (They literally exploded off their hinges and flew about 50 feet, killing several gnomes. We got a little carried away with the pyrotechnics.)
The Kobold Press December Sale is a beacon of light and warmth amid the ice madness, with savings of up to 80% on selected items while supplies last. Rummage through its glittering heaps and you’ll find:
- Midgard Tales hardcover 25% off $29.99
- Kobold Press t-shirts in XL, L, and S $9.99
- Hoard of the Dragon Queen Autographed Edition for 5th Edition D&D $24.99
- Kobold Guide to Board Game Design 40% off $12.99
- Print issues of Kobold Quarterly up to 80% off!
- Midgard Bestiary for 4th Edition D&D in print for just $9.99
- …And dozens more dragon-level deals!
This sale ends on Friday, December 5 and quantities are sharply limited on some items, so get ‘em now!
Widdershins is a renowned thief who has her own personal god named Olgun. Olgun lives inside Widdershins (or Shins, as she is known by her friends). He lends Shins portions of his limited powers, and these loans allow her to perform tasks that would be far beyond a mundane person. Shins has decided to return to her home city after spending an adventure-filled year away. They say you can never go home, and, sadly for Shins, this is true. Not only must she find a way to make amends with her friends, but also it turns out that her nemesis Lisette is back in town and she brought some heavies with her—the kinds of heavies that have the ability to cause supernatural harm. To top all this off, something strange has put the city into a siege mentality. Now Shins and Olgun must mend fences, face Lisette, and figure out what plagues Shin’s hometown.
Ari Marmell and the iconic Widdershins are back, and they are both at the top of their games. Marmell had me from the first novel of his that I ever read. I had used several of the products he wrote for Dungeons & Dragons, but it was from his novels that I finally learned how talented he really is. No, he is not the second coming, but he is a damn good author. Widdershins as a character really is proof of Marmell’s depth of talent.
It might seem a tad ludicrous to have anything other than stuffing inside your chosen feast bird, but you never really know what will happen at that next gathering the adventurers attend. Happy feasting (and Happy Thanksgiving to all those celebrating it)!
You can roll randomly for a result below, or use the handy number provided with each entry to figure out your result on a d12. You can also pick the one that works for the area in which your characters currently linger.