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Your Whispering Homunculus: Least Guardian Angels

Your Whispering Homunculus

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Your Whispering Homunculus: 100 Strange Pets

Your Whispering Homunculus

“Bring it here!”

“Bring what here, master?”

“I’m not going to argue with you, cockroach, nor engage in tittle-tattle with a creature unable to beat a slug at snap or a hedgehog at cribbage. I’m referring to the thing you just put in the cupboard.”

“Oh that, ’tis nothing master, just some stray kitten I found.”

“I see, then let me have it.”

“Yes, master, here it is.”

“Kitten, you say. How odd. I thought they normally had four legs. Tell me, how would you describe this kitten of yours?”

“Fleshy.”

“And?”

“Unpleasing to the eye.”

“I see, and how many legs would you say it had?”

“Thirteen master.”

“Thirteen. Yes, I must confess, slimeslave, that I have yet to hear of any kitten with thirteen legs, pale flesh, and two heads. Not to mention the wings. You’ve been at my transmutation spellbook again haven’t you?”

“If I said yes would you punish me less for being honest master?”

“No.”

Anyone can have a cuddly kitten, a funny gerbil, or pet snake. These creatures are commonplace, but what kind of animals might appear in a pet shop where a manticore is a common sight, or in a world that breeds chokers and gibbering mouthers? Such places would surely have more exotic creatures than a slobbering collie dog or a purring fat cat.

Here is a list of exotic pets, together with a brief description if necessary. These creatures can become the basis for odd familiars, or even odder animal companions, the stuff of menageries or the servings at table. Some are less exotic and more tragic, some may defy logic, and others may in fact be fake. Some are very real, yet to look at them you’d think someone would have to make them up. Have fun with all of them, and be prepared to be surprised about just which are real and which are fantasy.

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Your Whispering Homunculus—A Time to Think of Those Less Fortunate, Part 3

Your Whispering Homunculus

A.K.A. Face thy Woe, and Know that thy Woe Has a Name, and that Name Is Kobold . . .

The Mouse Trap – A Kobold Adventure Path

They know only two things about him—his name and his trade.

They call him the Trapmaester, and for good reason. His (or is it hers?) are the greatest, most elaborate and devious traps ever seen in the alpine town of Ulrichshorn. Ever seen anywhere in the world some rightly claim.

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Your Whispering Homunculus—A Time to Think of Those Less Fortunate, Part 2

Your Whispering Homunculus

A.K.A. Face thy Woe, and Know that thy Woe Has a Name, and that Name Is Kobold . . .

Koboom!—A Kobold Adventure

The Shockdeath tribe is small and little known, but they have a deadly secret.

The tribe members have mated in the past with a group of dark stalkers and creepers, and as such, have inherited a little of these latter creatures’ death throes ability. When you kill these kobolds, they explode, messily and violently.

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Your Whispering Homunculus: A Time to Think of Those Less Fortunate

Your Whispering Homunculus

A.K.A. Face thy Woe, and Know that thy Woe Has a Name, and that Name Is Kobold . . .

“I hate today.”

“Master?”

“The celebration, the winter, the festivals. This one I hate more than the others.”

“But think how happy everyone else is today, lord, think of their happy faces, their full bellies, their family gatherings bursting with joy and pie.”

“Exactly. While I sit here with you and this inflatable pig.”

“But I thought it was what you wanted! Please, Master, put your party fez back on, or perchance the glittery wizard’s hat I also bought for you for this special day—the one with ‘wizard’ written upon it in big sparkly letters.”

“Hmm, today I prefer to think of those less fortunate than myself. On this day, of all days, we should think of those poor unfortunates that cringe in the shadows awaiting slaughter without dialogue™, and offer them succor…”

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